Tuesday 12 July 2011

Spiritual Weekend Retreat At Pulau Besar [ Bahar Personal Log] July 2011 080910

A SPIRITUAL WEEKEND RETREAT AT PULAU BESAR MELAKA                                            8TH – 10TH. JULY 2011
My personal Log of the event.
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In the name of Allah S.W.T. my utmost syukur Alhamdulillah to HIM for giving me the insight and syahadah for me to compile my humble spiritual experience in HIS Gift of Merciful and Compassion that allows me the opportunity of my presence through all of the jemaah members in the weekend Spiritual Retreat at Pulau Besar Melaka during the short period of time, 8th-10th.July 2011.
Even then, Before I could begin to compile this experiences through my writings as for my personal reference, I  have always pray that the True Guidance from Allah S.W.T  will at all times guide me with my sincere trepidation and honesty dictation in my confession and revelation of this significant spiritual experience. ..SubahanaAllah.
At the same time, I have also reminded my self to continue with the Zikirullah and Astafar – in order to avoid the conflict from the influence of the Iblis & Syaitan to deviate my mind and soul from being ‘riak’ and restrain myself from groundless assertions and conjectures. 
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1.0          First of all,  I would like to thank Allah S.W.T, ALL ALMIGHTY for Gracing HIS COMPASSION with the utmost delicate arrangement to make this Faithful Spiritual mission a success. ( we are HIS humble servants, we can only planned for ourselves, But  the Ultimate Decision is HIS- He knows what is best for us) . With our sincere and honest Nawaitu , Niat and Doa – By God Grace, this is what HE has Granted us. Alhamdulillah.
2.0           It all began with an unpresented proposal from our beloved brother ,Tengku Baha after one of our  Saturday weekly session at Sheikh ‘s house who then suggested this program and logistic of the venue. With the blessing from our  beloved and respectful Sheikh Dr Ismail Kassim, it was sooner than expected that it bercame a Testimonial chain of event for all of our jemaah members. It became a divine mission at “One Destinated Place”, for ‘One Definite Mission”: in our quest to seek the Divine Spiritual Truth and Devine knowledge of HIM – Alhamdulillah....  
3.0          The question of “Why we were there ?” or “Why I was there ?”  I sincerely believe with my humble opinion and gesture -  Only with “Iman and Taqwa” will each of us be able to attest the ‘answer’  to this Question  by submitting ourselves to HIS Will – the possible way of spiritual understanding and knowledge are we able to seek the divinity spiritual experience and truth. –
4.0           As I humbly referred myself, - There are many questions in reaching to a Definite Answer, And likewise there are many uncertainty Answers in respond towards a Definite Question in our search for the supreme divinity knowledge of Allah.  – Only, those with the ILMU, AMAL AND HONESTY will be able to have this ANSWER. ( .... Binasalah orang yang Berilmu itu jika dia tidak Beramal Dan Binasalah orang yang berilmu dan beramal sekiranya Dia tidak IKHLAS ).
5.0          a025.jpg  My dear brothers and sisters, before I continue with this compilation of events, I wish to stress that my writings are purely based on my personal experiences and observation during the short quest of our divine retreat. I hope some of the experiences may have touched us one way or another. Perhaps, you may disagree with me at certain juncture and i will leave it to your honest judgement to digest every moment of it as we are the witness to that testimonial circumstances of event during those period of time. Some of you may have a different opinion based upon your own perspective view, experience and understanding. I will leave it to your own judgement of the truth.   
6.0           I am taking into account of my observation on the very first day of the trip ( 8th.July 2011) .                   - From the jemaah consensus during our musyawarah earlier ( at Brother Isa’s house) , we were suppose to gather at Kentucky Sungai Besi by 11 am. Alhamdulillah, we all gathered during the expected time and somehow we have taken more than an hour before we started our convoy towards Melaka. Our journey started sometime at 12.30 pm.
7.0           I believe, all of us took our leisure time to reach Melaka as we all expected to catch the Ferry at 5.00 pm. Somehow, we all reached the Ferry terminal at about 2.30 p.m. Upon reaching, I notice our brother Tengku Baha was busy urshering and directing  all of us to hurry up to the ferry as it was already leaving, otherwise we will have to wait for the next 5.00 pm schedule trip !!
8.0           Looking at the unexpected schedule, I was a little confuse as i saw only two of the convoy cars that had arrived at the parking lot. Nevertheless, I hurriedly headed towards the terminal together with my sisters and my elderly mother. I was wondering where the rest of the convoy. Anyway, as I reached the ferry deck , I saw our brother Haji Ibrahim was already unpacking his full load of luggage from his pick up truck. I just couldn’t imagine the kind of luggage and the significant big box was part of the things that needed to be up-loaded into the ferry. Besides, I notice our jemaah members (Tengku Baha,  Brother Asraf, Brother Suleiman, Brother Omar and others) were busy carrying the other luggages (including the food stuff, i.e onions, potatoes, bread,eggs, rice paked, kitchen utensils etc) onto the ferry despite enduring the sweating afternoon heat. It was the swetiest moment of sight for me – it seems like a huge family excursion !
9.0           Well, the amount of luggage was fine But the Big Black Fibre Glass Box measuring the size of 5feet x 4feet x 21/2 feet depth, with the weight of approximately 100kg is something to reckon !! How on earth are we getting this onto the ferry..?   I looked at the ferry and in my whole life experience of boarding the same  kind of commercial ferry, it  was not possible to load this kind of luggage size ! The obstacles were many -  The Ferry entrance door was too small to make way for the box if it needed to be up-loaded onto the roof top, the gap between the ground deck at the ferry deck is unstable  and if we could get it onto the deck , it would be another task to get it onto the ferry again as the ferry is not berthed firmly and I can’t imagine where on earth will this huge box be placed onto the ferry. 
10.0        When I first approach the box, i only saw our brother Dr Yahya was standing alone and  When I asked him what  was in that box,  he said sadly that this box weight like a huge coffin !!  Anyway, the box was full with the kitchen stuff and such.

11.0        During that period of time, I saw one of the ferry staff who was walking agitately and saying that the box is obviously too big to be loaded onto the ferry and he told us that was the first time in his entire service that he ever saw a passenger bringing such kind of box- to him it was rediculus and he told us bluntly he will need to have the Captain’s pernmission if we insisted or  alternatively it has to be unloaded into smaller parcels/boxes to have it up onto the ferry and he just walked away. 
12.0        That particular moment of time, Tengku Baha came and spoke to him to get help from others. Within seconds, out of the blues, I saw three staff came walking from the end deck and was looking down on us. They told us to lift up the box and they will assist it from that point. Well, to tell the truth, it was quite difficult at first glance to lift the box up onto the fragile grill step as it was too narrow and unstable. Furthermore, holding up the box really hurts your fingers when you grip the edges of the heavy box. The box cover was not tight and should it slip and drop, the whole content will just drop over and fall into the sea !! I was crossing my fingers and at the same time I prayed that it will not happen ! o la la
13.0        Anyway, by God’s will,  three of us ( Dr Yahya, Haji Ibrahim and myself)  lifted the box in such  a position and slide it up onto the railing and up to the deck for them to reach it. I can tell you from my heart that, the moment i lifted the box it was weighless (lighter) than i ever imagine from the first time I carried and move the box !! It just went up and slight smoothly on the grill deck for the workers to grap it from the deck and subsequently it went straight to the front deck of the Ferry without much hastle.- What can I say about this – ALHAMDULLILLAH – God is great – HE simplifies all the hurdles.- Neither, the Captain or any of the crew members were grumbling about it anymore despite the number of other luggages from 25 members of our jemaah team were nicely packed inside the ferry – it appears that the ferry deck floor seems to be ample enought to accommondate all those luggages - and the ferry just make its destination to Pulau Besar. – Our brother Suleiman told me he was rather surprise that all those luggage just fit into the floor space compartment.!!
14.0        Perhaps, in the eyes of others, some may have not notice what had actually happened. But that was the “little’ help from God (but it was really a huge relieve for us) to solve the problem of HIS humble servants in their course of a sincere will to meet the divinity journey. For me , the little observation is more than enought for me  to Praise Him with all my heart. In conclusion, we reached Pulau Besar very much earlier than we anticipated. This was not in our itinerary schedule at all. Can anyone explain this change of event. ...Allahu Akhbar.      
15.0        Being early at Pulau Besar, gave us ample time to organize ourselves and for the Azar prayers. Our programe proceeded smoothly as schedule and the atmosphre was rather calm. Thought , there was no attendance from the expected jemaah group from Johor Bahru, we were joint by Uztaz Nasohah and Uztaz Harun Yahya with three other members. This added to the congregation of the group.
16.0        Our Tazkirah and Mawlid program were carried out by our beloved Sheikh Dr Ismail Kassim. I would rather confess The Mawlid congregation with the zikirullah was so overwhelmed by the spirit of the congregation spiritual attention. The atmosphere was really calm where most of the congregation members appears to experience spiritual enhancement which are unexplanable in words. There were peace, calmness, serenity and tanquility divine experience from all the members. Almost , all of us are moved to tears . I notice that even Uztaz Nasohah and his members were rather surprise to this kind estraordinary spiritual experience. I had a glance at their faces and deep in my heart I know it was an acknolwledgement of their contenment to the results of this zikirullah.
17.0        There were sincere testimonials of divine and spiritual experience from each members. The presence of the wali-wali, malaikat and Divine presence through out the spiritual zikirullah session. Personnally, I felt total calmness while others felt more than they expected and were move by tears. I would rather leave it to each members to make their individual testimonials despite some have sincerely and honestly attest to that spiritually experience -  Devine sighting, spiritual feeling, the smell of devine fragrance that surrounded them and such and such where words alone are unable to describe the serenity beauty of those experiences.     SubhanaAllah.... 
18.0        The  congregation adjourn sometime at  2.00 am where i hurriedly make myself up to my bedroom. I believe all the members were mentally exhausted by then. As usual , I have the experience of fulfilling my Tahjud prayers. I was spiritually awaken sometime  at 3.30 am and performed my Tahjud and zikirullah quietly by the side of my bed until 5 am.  After the prayer , I looked out from my bedroom balcony. I could feel the tranquillity  breeze as I stand alone looking over the seaside and the early fajar  morning was so calm and there were continuous small cool breeze blowing over my face as though it was cleaning and wiping my tears away. I did a silent zikir for that precious moment of time.   SubhanaAllah...
19.0        Saturday, 9th.July 2011 -  By 5.30 am I was down stairs where I notice our Sheikh Dr Ismail was already with his tasbih sitting quietly at a chair. Our brother Isa was soundly asleep at the hall and several minutes later he was awaken. By then , our beloved  Brother Dr Yahya was preparing for the Subuh Azan and the serenity sound of the Azan has indeed awaken the rest of the jemaah for the Subuh prayers by 6.30am and continued with the Syuruk prayers by 7.15am. 
20.0        I was informed from my mother that before the Subuh prayers started, while she was with Mawar at the veranda over looking the sea front, she had a glimpse of the sea was covered with land instead of the sea water. Due to that presence feeling she abruptly acknowledge the divinity sensation within herself. The same was also felt by Mawar but it was not revealed till the later part of the night. Other then that scenario, I will leave it to my mother and sister to share their actual divinity experience. It would be better to hear from the horse mouth.
21.0        By 10am we continued with our next program – Majlis ILMU. It was led by Sheikh Dr Ismail and continued shortly by Uztaz Harun Yahya in the general hakikat  knowledge of
22.0        The climax of the Majlis ILMU started when Sheikh Dr Ismail took over the session again on the divinity significant  of the spiritual zikirullah and shortly after then the members of the congregation were asked to share their spiritual experience of the Zikir Nafas.  Each members gave an in-depth revelation of their spiritual experience and I would rather say that it was the most ‘touching’ moments of my life hearing each testimonial. I can see and feel the sincerity and honesty of their experiences.  Again, I will leave it to the imagination of the members to visualize each testimonial of the members . It would be an honor if all the effected members could be able to pen their experiences for the benefit of the congregation members.
23.0        However, when it came to my turn, I hardly have the strength to explain my experiences as I was overwhelmed with such divinity experience of my life. I was deeply moved to say anything to such clarity of my testimonials other then acknowledging  the zikir nafas has indeed moved me closer to the divinity experience.
 Once again, during my observation of the session, I notice that Uztaz Harun Yahya was out of words to the experiences that he was hearing from the jemaah members despite that he himself is knowledgeable on the significant of the Hakikat  knowledge of the Kalimah. I notice that he has eagerly prepared 2 pieces of papers  ( notes about the Kalimah ) which he wish to continue if given the chance but unfortunately his desire to pursue was short leave by the intense climax of the members testimonials. We then adjourn for our Zohor prayers which was led by Uztaz Harun Yahya upon the 

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